My father-in-law was my husband's best friend. They had the kind of relationship that even though they lived miles apart they always pick up where the left off. I remember when Matt and I first started dating he showed his father a photograph of me. Matt's dad looked at it and said, "Is she the one?" and Matt said, "Of course!" and with a cool reply his father said, "I thought so!". I have been extremely lucky in my life because I have never lost anyone extremely close to me before. This was uncharted emotional territory for both of us. I have always responded to grief, joy, and turmoil in writing so when I found out the news of his passing I immediately wrote down how I felt. I shared these writings with Matthew and my mother. They both had the same reaction: cried and begged me to read my tribute at the funeral. I was unsure. All my life I have been a classically trained artist. I have been enrolled in singing lessons since I was only in 2nd grade, relieving a $6,000 (per semester) singing scholarship, sang alone in front of over 500 people... Did I mention that I have been in over 20 musicals and had an acting coach from LA where I learned method acting and the art of performing? So the professional actress within me didn't want to ruin the performance of the reading with my own personal grief and tears. However, for the immense love that I have for my husband I wanted to honor his wish. I did read my tribute to his father at his funeral and it was one of the hardest things I have ever done. I made it through without tears until the ever end. I looked out into the audience and I saw that through my words I had evoked many tears and it moved me. After the funeral I had many compliments but the best conversation I had was with my father-in-law's brother. He approached me and said, "You must really be in love. No woman goes up in front of a lot of people and tells them how she loves her husband's last name and how she is honored to be apart of his family unless she is totally and completely in love. What you share with Matthew is a wonderful thing that not many people get to experience." And he is right. I am head over heels in love with Matthew and we are connected in such a way that our love and bond is unbreakable. Thank you God for our marriage for it is a grace, a blessing, and a true gift from above.
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This is my tribute to my father in law
June 13th 2015,
As I sit here and gather my thoughts about how I will never
see my father-in-law again on this earth… The man whom my husband calls his
best friend, the man whom our future children will admire, and the man of whom
I adore for his immediate love and acceptance of me into the Atkins family.
I am deeply saddened by his passing but dwell in the hope
and promise of Jesus and everlasting life.
So much has changed in these last two weeks but what remains
constant is love.
When Robert was in hospice we shared a special moment
together. He grabbed my hand and told me how proud he was of me. I quickly
responded, “Really? Why?” and he answered because you married my son.
But what I failed to tell him that day was how proud I am.
I am now more than ever - so thankful and honored to be an
Atkins. My last name is clothed in strength, dignity, endurance, and
discipline.
If you have ever had the pleasure of meeting an Atkins from
North Carolina then you know just how tenaciously industrious they are! The
Atkins men in my life are true southern gentleman with charm and the good old
American Dream philosophy made into a reality.
It may feel as though I have lost my father now but when I
look into my husband’s eyes. I see
Robert. He lives on through Matthew and the Atkins tradition of hard work and
determination remain alive.
Robert is the reason why my husband is willing to sacrifice
and give all he has to provide for me. My father in-law was the perfect model
as Matthew was able to see all that Robert did for this mother.
They say in hardship, trials, and strife you learn who truly
matters, who never did, and who always will… and I must say that we are truly
blessed for we have some of the most loving and caring people in our lives. I
would like to personally thank each and every one of you for being here today
to celebrate the life of Robert Atkins.
